I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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