Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
