But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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