Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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