You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
how do flat chested girls get laid?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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