he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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