idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
