is wine microwaveable?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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