she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
