no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
