I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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