grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
