we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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