if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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