i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
