Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
