Are we in a gay sports bar?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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