just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
