Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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