I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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