We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
