I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
dude i'm inner monologue high
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
