Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Randomize
