I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
