the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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