I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize