none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
