If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
