I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
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