But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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