Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
