We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
