just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
