well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
