dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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