is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
