Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Actions speak louder than pants.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
