Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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