i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
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