He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
