I wish i was in the wii world.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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