ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
