Only a mothe r could love this liver
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
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