have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Randomize
