He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
We left an ass print on the piano.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
