Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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