No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
