I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize