im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize