using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
